legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
