Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Every concussion has its silver lining
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
