i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
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