They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
