She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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