it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
