Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
