Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize