Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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