It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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