No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Barsexuality is the new black.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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