is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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