hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize