Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
