Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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