Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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