i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
