no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
