yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
