May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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