Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
