I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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