i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Randomize
