I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
the liver wants what the liver wants
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
