this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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