i think my tv is drunk
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
