I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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