If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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