I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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