bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
What a dumb baby whore.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
