He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
