I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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