Already got asked if we're dating
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
