Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
