two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
