I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
