Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I just want to make out with him forever
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
