Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
