"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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