I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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