dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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