I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
he puts the penis in happiness.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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