they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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