All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
