One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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