so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
