Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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