it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
