Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Randomize
