you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
